Dating: The Six Step Plan Checklist
The Six Dating Skills Journey from Selection through Dating into Marriage
Effective dating starts with a plan. This Plan starts with and revolves around the creation of two dating profile. If you follow the plan you are increasing your chances of experiencing positive results in playing the dating game. The foremost key to dating is your selection of who to date:
Your choice of whom you’ll marry is the single most important building block in whether your relationship will succeed. Your choice is more crucial than everything else combined that you will ever do to lay the foundation for your marriage. Your choice will determine whether you enjoy the satisfaction of a wise decision or the pain of a terrible mistake. It’s crucial to make the right selection!
Once you decide who to date the following checklist helps guide your journey to marriage
One: First date(s) are all about Getting to know one another in a POSITIVE way. Make sure your conversation is all POSITIVE. No negative talk at all. And, please don’t lay bare your deepest, darkest secrets and problems. Make him feel happy to be around you. If he’s interested he will let you know. If you’re interested you will accept his attention.
Two: Testing time. Men have a difficult time being exclusive. After dating a while, he may pull away trying to decide if you’re the one he can make happy. Resist the urge to do anything that resembles chasing him during this period. If he doesn’t call, this means (at least at this time) that he decided not to pursue further and you have to move on. Learn how to resist.
Three: Going steady. You each decide not to see anyone else and open up a little to see if you each can get what you need from the other. It’s time to investigate what the two of you are made of, again in a positive sense. Each partner must experience the best the other has to offer. At this point, you are creating a history of dates where he has succeeded and you feel supported. Be your best self and bring out your partner’s best. This is a definite skill; learn how to do it.
Four: Cultivate verbal intimacy. Now it’s time to start communicating on the deepest level. This communication probes to assess compatibility on how to handle differences, manage disagreements; it scrutinizes likes, dislikes, and habits, thinking on politics, religion, health, future parenting, financial matters, career expectation, housework, conflict resolution, anger, jealousy, insecurities, neediness and so forth.
Once these issues are resolved, usually, couples have established genuine love and may choose to engage in physical sex. Remember, Sex too soon can sink your budding romance before he gets to know the real you as a woman to be valued and prized. (That takes time). Be careful.
Five: Commitment. There is only one time to think about it – BEFORE you make it. With your heart and mind, you pledge unconditional love. To be there for each other in good and bad times. To weather all storms together. To be loyal and faithful. To honor and respect. To love each other for a lifetime. If you’re not ready to make that kind of vow–you’re not ready for marriage.
Six: Engagement. At this point, it is time to practice the two most important skills of staying married: the ability to apologize and to forgive. The perfect time to practice giving apologies and finding forgiveness is during the engagement. Learn how to do that!
Another benefit of the engagement period is to let passionate love “settle” into ordinary everyday love with your best friend and lover in a far deeper kind of love that will stand the test of time.
This is just the beginning of understanding how love grows and develops into happy relationships. Stay tuned for more.