My Mission — A Promise to You
I will teach you “Human Nature Principles” to avoid dating the wrong man ever again, nor experience the heartbreak of brutal love again, nor suffer debilitating relationship rejection ever again. Going forward, you will handle rejection dating and you will never need to fear falling in love again.
I will teach you how to understand the mysteries of true love. How men pursue. And how to implement six vital stepping-stone-skills to apply to building a once in a lifetime loving relationship for you and the love of your life…
A TALL ORDER, I know.
NOTE: These Principles are NOT new. Many, though, regard these “principles” as ‘old-fashioned blabber’ designed to slam feminism backward. To repress the modern woman’s sexual agency. To render women as weak and helpless. To stifle progressive feminism from standing in its new light of truth. Whatever …
I counter with: Yada, Yada, Yada. Are current pop culture dating rituals bringing relationship happiness? Are women selecting the right men to date? Are breakup rates still high? Are couples happy in marriage? Are divorces still spirling out of control? Are emotional needs being fulfilled or, lack of, still tearing couples apart?
Are women and men still confused on how to navigate “team/partnership” roles? Do couples know how to make love grow into marriages that last?
Seems every dating guru out there has a different POV and strategy.
So what really works?
HERE’S THE SECRET: “Human Nature Principles” have already outlined how relationships work best. No need to rewrite the script. These “laws” (sound, proven rules of direction) define the basis for effective, loving relationships. These principles are evergreen not prone to failure. Practicing these principles lead to enduring love.
When you change the script, confusion, anxiety, depression, loneliness all ensue. However, as you navigate the turbulent waters of dating, when you follow the script, setbacks are kept to a minimum. That said, …
keep an open mind as we move along in the discussion. Okay?
Let’s start with this: The BIG Plus and by far the most intriguing secret is to learn the art of “the Cat and Mouse Pursuit” — And yes, ladies, men still play this game and if you are to win, you need to be one step ahead.
Learn how to engage his mind to pursue, and his heart will follow — let him “catch you” — NOT the other way around. (more on this later).
Dating today is much more complex than it used to be. Society has changed its view of what defines a relationship. Women have changed how they view their “sexual agency”. Men have reacted with confusion in determining their role and often remain unresponsive. I mean, who knows which puzzle pieces fit together to establish a healthy loving relationship?
Many tough questions need answering–such as: how to identify the man most likely to love you? What role does each party play in a relationship? How is compromise made? How to identify commitment? What does love look like? How to know when you’re ready for marriage? Questions are as endless as trying to touch bowels of the sea.
The good news is answers are surprisingly simple: IF you listen & apply!
The focus of my promise, therefore, is toward helping you untangle this maze of confusion. It’s to provide enough education for you to understand that “human nature” has already outlined how relationships work best. No need to rewrite the script. Therefore, you will learn principles that can be applied to every aspect of relationship success.
- get dumped after giving all your love
- cry uncontrollably over disputed issues
- spend your precious time with a commitment phobic
- suffer wrenching heartbreak over lost love
You will learn to date with purpose and direction valuing yourself up as the “prize” that you are. Watch as the eyes of the man you’re dating open wide to clearly see you as the love of his life. He will recognize you as the woman he wants to pursue to the altar as his beloved wife.
These proven relationship skills are based on principles of human nature that have been either forgotten or never learned, yet designed to help women date with the wisdom to safeguard their hearts until commitment. When you master these skills you will know how to:
- Select your best match upfront without having to kiss the frogs along the way.
- Start by completing two profiles:
* Personal Profile: identifies your core
* Selection Profile: describes the type of man most likely to love and marry you
- Position yourself as the ultimate challenge for a man to catch as his soul-mate
- Use time as your best ally in winning his heart and his love
- Apply ageless human nature principles to your relationship that work
- Engage the pull-back strategy when he hesitates to commit and why it works
- Appreciate the only workable organizational structure for successful relationships. This chart outlines how marriages work best. Couples who apply the rules experience peace, love, and harmony together, avoiding many problems.
- Practice principled love to maintain committed love for a lifetime
To begin, let’s discuss what doesn’t work. Let’s talk the reality of falling in love, dating, and marriage. Because I can assure you, I’ve been around the block a few times and by knock-down blows and punches I’ve learned the hard way what it takes to-date-to-marry. So I feel fully qualified to ‘tell it like it is’ – It’s call life experiences.
Life Experience A: Uncommitted Sex Sucks!
Millions of women know this is true. Here’s how it plays out: You give the essence of your soul, adorned with the gems of your fragile heart to this man. You pour out the naked vulnerability of your spirit to this man. You sex this man with all your being as if bathing him in life’s holy water . . . and then unexpectantly one day, he announces: he’s not ready for marriage, he has second thoughts, he needs to establish his career first, he has found someone else, and/or he just moves on. Yada. Yada. Yada. You know what I’m talking about.
Basically, he dumps you.
I know. I struggled too. I went from one no-win relationship to another. I felt frustrated, rejected, mislead. But what puzzled me most was what happened when I found someone promising: The chemistry was right. We clearly liked each other. We had much in common. But after a few dates or a few months, he disappeared — why did this budding romance fizzle? What went wrong?
Frantic to find answers I turned to love gurus, TV personalities, and how-to books by the boatload to no avail. They all spouted popular dating opinions of the day—I was already doing that. It wasn’t working. Desperate, I set out on my own to find the truth about how love develops and grows. It was grueling work. But I searched and I found. Now the grunt work is done and I’ve compiled valuable information into a workbook to share with you so that you won’t have to flounder like I did.
And so I wrote “How to Date to Marry” because I discovered that to attract the man ready for marriage, you have to establish ‘value’ for yourself first. You have to believe and project that YOU are the Prize. Not arrogantly, but in a way that allows him to value who you are deep inside. The woman who is his soulmate — The woman he wants to marry — The woman who is his Prize. Grandma-D’s insight: Build Upon Your Value — Not Your Sex!
Life Experience B: “Time” is your Best Ally in Winning Committed Love
For him to understand your value, takes TIME. You see, many women today give too much, especially sexually, too soon BEFORE he values her. When he gets sex too soon, he thinks he’s already won the prize (sex). The prize, though, is YOU, but by not allowing enough time for him to realize that, you have sabotaged yourself as the prize. In his mind, he’s won easily, faces no challenge and moves on.
Fair? Heck “No”, but, that’s a man. That’s the reality! You’ll learn a lot about how men view sex and the pursuit of a woman in Part II of the How-to-Date-to-Marry workbook.
What! No sex! Now, don’t get your tail feathers in a spin. Point is, there is a time for sex. But make sure you know the right time by noting his display of appreciation for your uniqueness and how he demonstrates that he values you as special and understands that consensual sex between the two of you is an act of love meaningful for both.
Well, that was a mouthful. Don’t underestimate what that means if you’re dating for marriage.
Now if you’re just interested in having sex for sex sake and you’re not interested in building a meaningful relationship–so be it–you probably won’t want to read further. Go sex as many men as you want. But for others, think about this …
Women talk a lot about their own sexual agency today because they are liberated from taboos of yesteryear–free to engage in their own dating rituals including an open pursuit of whoever strikes her fancy. Free to enjoy uncommitted sex with whomever — whenever — whatever — to explore her own sexual agency to the full at will. Free at last. Free at last. Yes, I’m free at last.
Oh, Yeah–but at what price? If you have sex early on, say first 3 dates, or first week or two, have you ever wondered whether this guy has herpes? How many women has he been with the past week or months prior to you? Did he always use protection? Could he be AIDS infected? Is it his habit to sex women so soon without knowing their sexual history? Are you opening yourself up to an STD? Might you accidently get pregnant? How do you know???
In addition, are women really happier in their modern day relationships sexing every man they date? Well … some women feel they’ve been used as sex toys leaving them emotionally drained and deeply depressed. Tossed aside when he fancies another woman. Then they’re at square one again with another man. Repeating same old process. Is that what you want?
Yes, dating rules have changed, but for the better? Truth is that … Some things NEVER change!
Grandma-D’s insight: Understanding the value of Time is Crucial to successful dating leading to marriage. Grandma-D will teach you how to use the element of Time wisely
Life experience C: Mother Nature Laws NEVER Change
Her laws remain constant — the sun rises in the east and sets in the west. Likewise, laws of Human Nature also remain constant. Men are men and women are women designed to complement each other in harmony when working within the boundaries prescribed by Human Nature. Fight against these laws and … YOU LOSE! End of story.
These Human Nature Laws/principles and the dating skills derived from them guide couples to the reality of how relationships work best. Rebuff them if you want, but in the long run, when and where it counts, this is the REAL DEAL. Trouble sets in when you start mucking up this arrangement. Therefore the intention of the workbook and this blog is to present the dating process as it works best.
Oh, you may scream “Outdated thinking!” and cry Grandma-D, you’re old-fashioned. You may play the feminist card. You may recoil because you want your ears tickled instead of hearing the truth. Or, you can pay close attention and open yourself up to the possibility that this POV might present valuable knowledge that can lead to your relationship happiness.
You’re not going to hear this anywhere else. I’m forthright enough to tell you what others are not brave enough to stand up for. I want you to remember that YOU are the Prize. But you must learn HOW to set yourself up as such. Learn HOW to set yourself apart from the crowd. Learn HOW to allure him as the woman he pursues.
Grandma-D’s insight: Practicing Human Nature Principles Wins Love
Life experience D: You Gotta have a Plan to Win the Game
Let’s face it many men today are commitment phobic. Oh, they’ll love you on their terms which, often does not include marriage. So you need to find a way to identify the man “ready for marriage” then date with skill and purpose, direction and a decisive action plan to get to the altar.
A game plan means you have the dating skills to know what you’re doing, why you’re doing it and how to do it step-by-step that “opens his heart” causing him to bond with you like no other woman can.
Life experience E: Dating Skills in Six-Steps for the Win
With the plan and skills in hand, this journey will take you from Selection, through Dating into Marriage focusing on the immutable laws of Human Nature coupled with the synergy of principled love (agape) and romantic love (eros), and the principles that flow from them. Following are the six dating skills that are essential if you truly want to master how to date to marry.
These steps are sometimes controversial, sometimes “you gotta be kidding me” dating skills that, again, many women have dismissed, forgotten, or never learned.
These win-win principles are based on ‘how men think’ when challenged to PURSUE.
The secret is to set yourself up as the “PRIZE” and he’ll go all-out to catch you.
Here are the Six Steps:
One: First date(s) are all about Getting to know one another in a POSITIVE way. Make sure your conversation is all POSITIVE. No negative talk at all. And, please don’t lay bare your deepest, darkest secrets and problems. Make him feel happy to be around you. If he’s interested he will let you know. If you’re interested you will accept his attention.
Two: Testing time. Men have a difficult time being exclusive. After dating a while, he may pull away trying to decide if you’re the one he can make happy. Resist the urge to do anything that resembles chasing him during this period. If he doesn’t call, this means (at least at this time) that he decided not to pursue further and you have to move on. Learn how to resist.
Three: Going steady. You each decide not to see anyone else and open up a little to see if you each can get what you need from the other. It’s time to investigate what the two of you are made of, again in a positive sense. Each partner must experience the best the other has to offer. At this point, you are creating a history of dates where he has succeeded and you feel supported. Be your best self and bring out your partner’s best. This is a definite skill; learn how to do it.
Four: Cultivate verbal intimacy. Now it’s time to start communicating on the deepest level. This communication probes to assess compatibility on how to handle differences, manage disagreements; it scrutinizes likes, dislikes, and habits, thinking on politics, religion, health, future parenting, financial matters, career expectation, housework, conflict resolution, anger, jealousy, insecurities, neediness and so forth.
This is the time to discover each other’s domestic habits: Is he clean? Bathe often enough? Is he messy or overly orderly? Too lax or a perfectionist? Can he fix a leaky toilet or unplug the kitchen sink? Is he lazy or resourceful? Helpful with household chores? Can he cook? Who are his friends? Who would he invite over to your house? Does he drink responsibly? Watch too many sports on TV with his buddies leaving you feeling alone? etc.
Once these issues are resolved, usually, couples have established genuine love and may choose to engage in physical sex. Remember, Sex too soon can sink your budding romance before he gets to know the real you as a woman to be valued and prized. (That takes time). Be careful.
Five: Commitment. There is only one time to think about it – BEFORE you make it. With your heart and mind, you pledge unconditional love. To be there for each other in good and bad times. To weather all storms together. To be loyal and faithful. To honor and respect. To love each other for a lifetime. If you’re not ready to make that kind of vow–you’re not ready for marriage.
Six: Engagement. At this point, it is time to practice the two most important skills of staying married: the ability to apologize and to forgive. The perfect time to practice giving apologies and finding forgiveness is during the engagement. Learn how to do that!
Another benefit of the engagement period is to let passionate love “settle” into ordinary every day love with your best friend and lover in a far deeper kind of love that will stand the test of time.
Next, let’s consider how to navigate through those six steps from the Workbook: How-to-Date-to-Marry
The Workbook in three sections:
- The Selection Process
- The Six Dating Skills
- Marital Harmonics
Meet Julie and Dave
The material the workbook is presented in fiction form as a love story. The story centers on Julie Shannon who you’ll meet and watch fall in and out of love and endure the trials and tribulations of love gone awry … until she “gets it” through learning how to date with purpose and direction leading to the altar.
Julie dates five different men before she gets it right. Finally she meets Dave Marlin, but before plunging in, she learns how to assess the “inner” man by using “time” as her best ally. Even so, she has neglected something vital and Dave is hedging on commitment. Learn how she uses a time-tested strategy to gain commitment and why it works most of the time–IF he loves you enough. Then learn how to maintain first-flush passion to enjoy settled love for a lifetime.
Let’s meet the six guys Julie dates and what she learns from each:
- Jess — learn the outcome of desperation in her foolish experience
- Rick — see her definition of “relationship” shattered by a reality check
- Phil — watch her evaluate temporary rewards vs long-term commitment
- Walter — experience her distress as she weighs the price of “settling”
- Stu — feel her excitement in the arms of Stu Malone in her highly charged interracial relationship as she tries to tame a notorious womanizer
- Dave — finally meet Dave Harland with the twinkling teddy bear eyes. Dave is kind, sensitive, funny and ‘oh, so sexy’ and fits her SELECTION profile to a T, but WAIT … this time does she possess the necessary skills to challenge herself into his heart? Has she learned from past mistakes? Then learn her strategy to gain commitment when Dave hedges.
And as Julie learns YOU learn because you will complete ‘Do You Remember Modules’ that will help you apply key principles to your own relationship. This is where YOU get involved. You begin to take a deep hard look at either past or current relationships to adjust, end or make better … and that’s what you want isn’t it?
At conclusion of Part II you will be able to answer these questions:
- Is sex the same as love? What is the major difference?
- What is intimacy? How do you know when you have reached it?
- What are the advantages of holding off on sex during early stages of dating a new partner allowing for control of what?
- Upon what is a genuine relationship based?
- What is meant by ‘challenging yourself into a man’s heart?
- How is that challenge met? Why does this technique work?
- What actions by Paul gave an early indication of what he really wanted from a relationship?
- Had Julie used her Selection Profile would she have dated Jess? Why or why not?
- How can loneliness cause one to make unwise relationship decisions?
Life experience F: Relationship Building can be Easy and Fun … When You Know What You’re Doing
It takes insight into life’s most profound issues which two people must work through with practical application that focus on bonding two diverse personalities into one. You need to know what you’re doing, why you’re doing it and how to do it. The How to Date to Marry workbook helps you to:
- Recognize what love IS and IS NOT. Then learn all four aspects of love and how to weave them into the relationship with emphasis on the synergy between Romantic (eros) and Principled (agape) love
- Appreciate the definition of first love
- Develop a Personal Profile that defines your inner core (good, bad, ugly)
- Develop a Selection Profile that defines your best match (this becomes your guide to identifying the man who will love you all the way. It’s the gauge you will use to determine whom you should date/ and or whether dating a particular man is just a waste of time
- Understand the importance of the Selection Process (This is your single most important challenge and decision. Your choice of whom to marry is more crucial than everything else combined that you will ever do to find a love you can develop into happy marriage.
- Understand the pulling power of the pursuit
- Entice him to pursue you like cat and mouse
- Learn how men and women play sex and the dating game differently
- Master the six skills of the dating process recognizing yourself as the prize as you work together with your partner step by step
Trust the power of time as your best ally
- Grasp the true meaning of commitment
And Walla! Invite me to your wedding day!
Your new marriage will be solidly set on a foundation of proven principles that when practiced will ensure a marriage that complements and broadens both you and your husband for a lifetime of love and joy. And you’ll be able to cope with any problems together as a team in unity always for the good of the family. Congratulations!
Who this book is NOT for — the woman who:
- Is not ready for marriage
- Wants quick bullet points to answer all questions
- Wants to explore her sexual agency to her heart’s content w/o commitment
- Doesn’t want to read a workbook
- Doesn’t want to follow the story of Julie and Dave
- Doesn’t see the need to change dating habits
- Is perfectly content with the way she currently dates
Who this workbook IS for — the woman who:
- Tired of rejection – ready to learn how to stop getting dumped
- Is ready for marriage – ready to learn how to date to marry
- Wants her love fully returned to her in commitment
- Tired of playing the same old no-win dating game
- Wants to learn how love develops and grows
- Wants to identify the glue that holds love together and how to use it
- Wants to learn how to maintain her husband’s love for a lifetime
Again, here is the Plan:
The Plan starts with and revolves around the creation of two dating profile. If you follow the plan you are increasing your chances of experiencing positive results in playing the dating game:
1) Personal profile: designed to help you understand the Selection Process by understanding who you are first–deep down inside. You lay naked in the truth of your core self. Only then can you select your best match upfront without having to kiss all the frogs along the way.
2) Selection profile: describes the man best suited to love you and is ready for marriage. Selecting the ‘right’ partner is your single most important challenge and decision. Your choice of whom to marry is more crucial than everything else combined that you will ever do to find a love you can develop into happy marriage. All of this is explained in detail in the workbook.
3) Your road map: Now you have a guide for what you’re looking for in a potential partner. Makes it much easier to pick and choose who to date. Then let the dating process play out to see if this selection is the right one. At least you’ve hedged your bets with the likelihood that this selection could lead to marriage.
4) Let the dating begin: There will be ups and downs. But far fewer if you follow your Selection Profile guideline. Now that you’ve selected the man to date, it’s time to start following the Six Steps to Dating that lead to marriage.
5) Learn the secret of cat and mouse pursuit: let him catch you — not the other way around. Create the opportunity to be chased and he will pursue you all the way down the aisle.
5) Couples apply “principled love”: learn how to resolve issues in a way that ensures relationship happiness during the dating process into marriage. In other words our clients learn — how to beat the odds of 1 out of 2 breakups and divorces.
Again, I will teach you how to stop dating rejection based on understanding how men pursue, followed by implementing Six Dating Skills to Love and Marriage. These skills are powerful because they smoothly bridge your journey from Selection, thru Dating into Marriage. My approach is unlike any other you’ve seen because the bridges are based on time-tested human-nature principles that have been proven throughout the years on how relationships work best.
Now the only question to ask is…
“Do I believe enough in myself to invest just $47 (less than cost of a good pair of shoes) in an education in elite dating skills that will help me identify my best match then help me develop my relationship into the lifetime love that I deserve? Do I want to be a happy bride? “Do I want to be loved?” Do I want to share my life with a man I love? Of course you do! Don’t wait another minute to start. Click here!
“To love the one who loves you–To admire the one who admires you–In a word, To be the idol of one’s idol–Is exceeding the limit of human joy–It is stealing fire from heaven.”Delphine de Girardin
P. S. You need to make the right decision for you, but you must make that decision right NOW and not waste another minute running from one no-win relationship to the next — going from man to man without winning commitment. No more broken hearts; no more love triangles; no more cheating; no more empty promises; no more lies; no more emotional distress. No more emptiness.
Instead, learn how to date to marry!
It’s time for your happiness! In just 24 hours you will learn enough to immediately improve your dating skills. This new-found know-how will boost your attitude and confidence level higher than ever before as you become a woman who dates with purpose and direction… all the way to the altar. Order here.
Now into Part III – Marital Harmonics
You didn’t think I would just leave you at the altar without helping you navigate through marriage, did you? What kind of Grandma would I be to do that … Even if marriage is not on the horizon just yet, you, as a single woman, or divorced with a first marriage that didn’t work, still need to understand and be prepared to know in advance what to expect and how to, along with your husband, work together to thrive in a happy marriage.
Single women … Listen carefully.
At this point, you’ve caught him, but how do you KEEP him? Now the real work begins. How do you as a couple keep your love alive to thrive and grow through the years? This where the magic of ‘Agape’ love anchors the vows. This section explains, what it is, how it works and why it works.
As newly weds, Julie and Dave are experiencing difficult times in marriage. A co-worker, Guy Reid introduces Dave to “Marital Harmonics” — an Org Chart for family living. However, this bold, principle–based role specific concept alienates him; besides, he knows Julie would NEVER agree. Finally, desperate to save their marriage, Dave asks Julie to listen and she blows up — Outraged!
In time, though, when nothing else works, Julie listens again with an open mind and heart with Dave by her side … This time all the pieces of the puzzle fell into place. Then the ups and downs were slowly mellowing into an even flow. Julie found her love and respect for him deepening each day.
Order your copy now. Click on this link.
At the conclusion of Part III which is based on Human Nature Principles, you’ll be able to answer these questions:
- How are the roles of husband and wife designed to complement each other?
- How does a husband gain cooperation from his wife?
- How does a wife demonstrate cooperation?
- Does supportive mean passive? Explain.
- Explain the 4-step strategy to resolving problems.
- What are Marital Harmonic principles designed to do?
- What is the principle to practice before lashing out in anger?
- What principles show how to ‘keep putting up with one another?”
- Which principles have a bearing on sex in marriage?
- Which principles offer counsel on rearing children?
- Which principles help couples bond in purpose and direction
- Why does principled love never fail?
Pretty exciting stuff, huh! At last, you’ve found a relationship workbook that will give you the inside secrets to how love and romance develop and progress. With this information in hand, you will know how to handle each phase of a relationship from SELECTION through DATING into MARRIAGE.
Come on, grab the happiness you deserve and start living the loving life you deserve! Click here.
REMEMBER: You Can Resist the Fear of Romantic Rejection!
Bonus: A short compelling love story of forbidden love entitled: A BitterSweet Encounter will be sent when you purchase this unique workbook: How-to-Date to Marry. Just send the receipt and I’ll send you the link.
Share with me your comments on the workbook. Ask questions. Get involved in feedback. Would love to hear from you.
Remember, you can also CALL ME.
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